When I was stuck in my job knowing I was a square peg, I knew I wanted to do something different. I’m the sort of person who has an enquiring mind. I always want to know what makes people tick.
Why do they do what they do?
How does that impact on me?
What would happen if they had handled if differently?
Psychology seemed to be the answer. I’d been wondering about it and there was a course at my local college for an A level. A chance conversation with a colleague established that she fancied doing it to and hey presto! I had a comfort blanket to take to college with me.
It wasn’t what I expected. It’s a very theoretical topic. Looking back I wonder if I expected practising on fellow students with a big black couch. I guess not.
Still, I saw it through and to my credit I have a grade ‘B’ ‘A’ level in Psychology, but I knew I didn’t want to pursue this any further.
It hardly seems any time at all since I last spoke to the Career's Advice Service but its been over a month and they rang me today to see how I am getting on.
Its good, I can actually say I've made some progress. The very fact that I knew they would be ringing me today has spurred me on to make a decision.
The dilemma (to save you re-reading old blog pages) was whether or not I wanted to train as a counsellor or a coach. Although similar in terms of personal skills, they are very different approaches and I need to train differently. Training of course means out-laying money and time. Both of which I have very little spare!!!!
So its official. I am going to be a life-coach.
Now that is a goal! I guess I need to give it a deadline. I thought 2 years. End of March 2012. Spring. That fit with green-shoots.
Perhaps I'm being to easy on myself. Maybe too hard. I guess that's something i'll share with you when I know myself.
In the immediate future, I need to find out more about the training side. There are so many life coaching courses out there and I have so many questions about them.
How do I know if they are any good?
How do I know if they will be recognised qualifications?
I've agreed a goal with the Career's Advice Service of reviewing this in 4 weeks - I'd better crack on.
As a new blogger I am really starting to see the advantages of blogging.
Take today for example. I don't normally post today, but I'm sooo brassed off with work. I finish work quite early and am almost always home before hubby. There's no-one home to talk to.
So I get home, grab his royal doggyness and we stroll in gorgeous sunshine. Almost guaranteed to make me feel better. Not today. But grabbing a pen and paper did the job.
We found a nice bench, and in filling one side A4, I successfully put all my frustration into the crisp white paper. Its the diary I don't keep. All I had to do tonight is type it up.
Q - So what has frustrated me so much?
A - The people I work with.
I'm the sort of person who cares about others. I'm interested in what they do at the weekend and what's going on in their lives. I care. I used to work in customer service and I thrived on it. I loved helping others. I can see a purpose in it. Now I work in a pointless job with people who (and this is a generalisation) are full of their own self importance because they produce reports and spreadsheets.
Pah! So who cares really? I have some stuff to sort out about courses and in a couple of years I will be free and have a new career. One that helps ans supports others.
I want to fill my life with like minded people.
Tomorrow I have the day off, that makes a lovely long weekend when I can catch up with like minded, caring people.
Boss always asks me what rating I think I deserve. I always say “run-of-the-mill-average-every-gets-this-middle-rating”. I did know that my confidence has been higher lately as a result of my own coaching but didn’t have the confidence to say I deserved the higher rating.
Boss gave me a higher than average rating. I’ve worked with Boss now for over 9 years and this is only the 2nd time he’s given me anything other than run-of-the-mill-average-every-gets-this-middle-rating. The other time it was a less than average rating.
So I came home from work today, completed elated. What a confidence boost.
"It takes a lot of courage to release the familiar and seemingly secure, to embrace the new. But there is no real security in what is no longer meaningful. There is more security in the adventurous and exciting, for in movement there is life, and in change there is power."
My boss’ boss believes in self development. He gave me an opportunity to attend a Springboard programme. It started to give me some building blocks, some things to think about. It didn’t have all the answers, and looking back I believe I attended it too soon. But it started something very small, very gradual, but very effective.
I just got back from a fabulous holiday with Hubby. The destination wasn’t my first choice, nor was it his. For reasons out of our control, it wasn’t our second choice either. It just happened to be very cheap and cheerful.
But the holiday was still brilliant. I guess it could have been miserable. The weather was against us from the start. I could have sat be-moaning the fact that I really wanted to be in the Lake District (my fave holiday destination). But I believe that to a great extent you can make your own luck and as such you have two choices - accept and enjoy where you are and what life deals you or be miserable. I chose to see it as an opportunity to do and see something new.
The result was a holiday where our time (hubby and mine) was totally our own. No agendas running in the background, no need to be anywhere at any given time (other than the restaurant booking on Friday – fab Mexican). We could be completely spontaneous.
We did get some bad work news whilst we were away, but not even this spoilt the holiday.
"You must begin to trust yourself. If you do not then you will forever be looking to others to prove your own merit to you and you will never be satisfied. You will always be asking others what to do, and at the same time resenting those from whom you seek such aid"
Something happened today. It doesn’t matter exactly what, and it doesn’t matter who was to blame, but it really got me thinking.
TRUST! Its one of my values. Maybe that’s why I expect others to give it as much respect as I do. Is that why I’m disappointed when someone I hold dear uses the word, but because they don’t place the same importance on it, they let me down?
Perhaps I expect too much. Other people will of course have different values than me. That doesn’t mean they think any less of me – does it?
So, I am left with this thought – How do I ensure that I instil trust in others? I am going to need to do this if I am going to counsel or coach. Will I expect my clients to take this leap of faith?
The latest in a series of posts exploring how I've ended up where I am.
Once you’ve fallen from your tree, its hard to pick yourself up again. I found myself in a downward spiral. Every mistake I made, no matter how small would become major. I’d beat myself up about it, make myself feel bad. Then I’d worry about doing something in case I made a mistake. In case someone found out that I’d made a mistake. They might discover that I’m an impostor, pretending to do the job. I couldn’t really do the job could I? the more I worried, the more I panicked, each individual task became a major event and in my panic, I’d find myself making more mistakes.