Monday 5 April 2010

Looking Back - Downward Spiral

The latest in a series of posts exploring how I've ended up where I am.

Once you’ve fallen from your tree, its hard to pick yourself up again. I found myself in a downward spiral. Every mistake I made, no matter how small would become major. I’d beat myself up about it, make myself feel bad. Then I’d worry about doing something in case I made a mistake. In case someone found out that I’d made a mistake. They might discover that I’m an impostor, pretending to do the job. I couldn’t really do the job could I? the more I worried, the more I panicked, each individual task became a major event and in my panic, I’d find myself making more mistakes.

See previous Looking Back Post

2 comments:

  1. Sheeesh that's being harsh on yourself! Way too harsh. They say the only way we can truly learn and move forward is through making mistakes. That's why they give kids pencils in school, so they can learn where they have made mistakes, rub them out and put in the correct answer.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Thanks Polargirl - but that's the kind of downward spiral that is very easy to get into, and once its started its very difficult to get off the Merry-go-round.

    And just 15 months ago that's exactly where I was.

    ReplyDelete