Wednesday, 7 July 2010

Back to work with a bump

Well, back to work with a bump. Don't you just hate it when that happens!!!

The office was stifling, so the window blinds were shut. On a plus side, Best Friend finally agreed to meet me for lunch. She sounded much brighter and more positive and I thought 'Great!' - I have a best friend back again.

We sat outside on the grass and I enquired about the pain she's had recently in her life. The answer I got back was uncharacteristic sarcastic and related to other friends who had been more supportive than me who had helped her through the bad times. Shock - I wasn't expecting that. All I've ever wanted to do was help. When have I ever not been there when she's asked for help. In fact at times over the past few weeks I've felt pushed out, unwanted even.

She walked away leaving me sobbing on the grassy slope just outside work.

I came home and wrote a letter to her. The letter was entirely written from my agenda. It talked of my anger and hurt. It discussed my reactions to the way she'd dealt with me (oops slipping into "effect" there.) I guess what actually happened was in her depressed state she became insular. She didn't notice she was contacting me and only noticed my lack of contact. In the last 8 weeks I've had so much on, with creating this Blog, thinking about, researching and choosing a coaching course and starting my business planning that I've let a lot of things slip, friends as well as the gym.

So, I moved back into 'cause', made a choice and took control. I metaphorically screwed up the letter and wrote a shorter one. A letter that reminder her that I had and always would support her, and an apology for getting it so wrong. I wrote this into a beautiful card from Tree of Life and will leave it on her desk tomorrow.

The image at the top has been published with the kind permission of The sentiments are great.

1 comment:

  1. Sometimes (actually most of the time) I just do not understand my fellow humans. What you've written makes me realise just what a massive undertaking you're - er - undertaking. I am stunned by what you've described. I find myself shaking my head in total astonishment. I know what I want to say but simply can't put it into words at the moment. Anger, sympathy, despair, concern, hurt and disbelief. I think it's called Angpathdescernurtlief. And a mute hope that somewhere someone is writing a letter back to you. XMB F